By Faridah Nakazibwe
There is a popular saying these days that “a real woman is not impressed with money.” I’m inclined to disagree. I dont necessarily think that a woman who checks a mans finances or runs a check on his credit rating is being a gold digger. Rather, i think she’s simply being a smart woman. Of course, there are a limits to which a woman must prioritise a man’s finances in deciding whether to date or marry him. Once that limit is crossed, then you start sending signals of a gold digger as a woman.
Having said that, i think the limit to which a woman considers your financial ability in deciding to date/marry you indicates to a great extent how smart she is. It shows how forward thinking she is. It shows she is looking out for both of you. That She is interested in having a roof over the family butter on your table, a good education for the kids and of course, a coat in winter. Prophet Muhammad (PBH)says, ” the wise and virtuos woman plans ahead” Bible Proverbs 31! says In light of this, i would have problems with a woman who didnt probe, however, subtle she may be, into how much you earn, how you spend, what streams of income you have, or into what longterms financial plans you have.
You’ll have problems with a woman who didnt dig into all that. Like what planet are you from? This isnt a socialist world where food and clothing is provided by the government. This is a harsh capitalist world where everyman has to provide for his own family.
In fact, one of the warning signs to look for in dating a woman is what interest she shows in your finances. What questions does she ask about your finances? what reaction do your achievements elicit from her? Some women have no sense of value for excellence. They will talk to a man who has rigorous academic degrees and not even ask what discipline it took to achieve that. They will talk to a man who pioneered a business and not even ask how he started it????? It shows you how we think.
As a man then, you would want your woman to be financially savy. To be concerned about what you earn, how much you earn, how you spend. In fact, you would like for her to give you that “you’ll eat you look” each time you triple the bottom line for your business or each time you write a down payment for your newest house. You would like for her female brain to go crazy each time that happens. It doesnt mean she is being a gold digger when she does that. You would like to think she is looking out for both of you. Just like u would go crazy and eat her each time she tells you she aced that exam, she got her postgraduate degree completed or she tripling the profit from her hair saloon or mobile money tik at the roadside.
Not every woman who vets your finances is being a gold digger, some, in fact, the majority of them, are just being Wise. It is the wise old King Solomon who blurted, “Wisdom plans ahead”!